Shaun The Conqueror (aka Shaun The Great)

Author's note: we were given a choice of prompt to write on. The one I chose was 'Her breath caught as she saw him standing there, sunlight dancing in his eyes.' We also had to choose a goal and mine was to get a 10 for voice.

Her breath caught as she saw him standing there, sunlight dancing in his eyes.  'Twas Shaun the Conqueror, also known as Shaun the Great. Only a few people in the universe knew his real name, and although I am one who knows, I am not allowed to say it. But I will anyways, his name was Shaun Campbell.

Mary ran over to where he was standing, a look of glory on his face. But before I continue with the epic tale that ensues, I should give you some background history of Shaun The Conqueror. He grew up in a small town in Wyoming. But even as a child, he knew that he was destined for greatness.

He always wanted to visit New York. So one day, he hopped a train. But he got on the wrong train, and ended up in China. But it was there that he met his trainer, a man that had no name. Well, he actually most likely had a name but it got lost in translation from the ancient Chinese scrolls on which the prophecy was written, but we'll call him The Ninja Master.

If your wondering what the prophecy was, it was that a man would come to China and order a hamburger with no burger, just ketchup and mustard. Then, he would fall into a sewer. After he got out of the sewer, a ninja would kidnap him and train him to be a ninja. This man would become the conqueror of the aliens when they invaded.

So, when he got to China, Shaun Campbell was hungry, so he ordered a hamburger from a hamburger stand. But he never really liked Chinese hamburgers, so he ordered one without the burger. But he really liked ketchup and mustard, so he told the dude at the stand to put those on. He ate the burger with no burger, and walked off to find another train.

The Ninja Master, not yet The Ninja Master, just a normal person, saw this happen. He had heard stories of the prophecy, and this got his attention. When Shaun Campbell got hit by a car and fell into a sewer, he knew that the prophecy was coming true.

Shaun Campbell climbed out of the sewer, and The Ninja Master that was still just a normal person waited for a ninja to come and kidnap him. But nobody seemed to notice what had happened. Then, it dawned on him. He was the one destined to be The Ninja Master, so he put on a ninja mask and grabbed a sack.

He went over and stuffed Shaun Campbell into the sack. The Ninja Master didn't really have a dojo or anything, so he just took him back to his apartment. When they got there, he let Shaun Campbell out of the sack.

"Where am I?" asked Shaun Campbell.

"The prophecy has come true. I must train you to be a ninja so you can defeat the aliens when they come," said The Ninja Master.

"Well, lets get cracking then," said Shaun Campbell.

"Well, I'm not really a ninja, but I do have Fruit Ninja for kinect," said The Ninja Master.

"I guess that will have to work," said Shaun Campbell.

And so they trained, into the wee hours of the night. They trained for weeks, then weeks became months, and months became years. Finally, the news came.

A messenger came into the apartment, and said: "Shaun Campbell, you are needed at the white house. We were spying on the alien planet and they're all getting on giant ship things with guns and stuff. We are positive they are meant for us. There isn't time to spare!"

So they boarded a bus and rode all the way to the white house. Once there, they went into the oval office. There was a screen with a view of the aliens. And sure enough, what the messenger said was true.

"What shall we do?" asked the president.

"Allow me to think," said Shaun Campbell.

"We don't have time to think!" said the president.

"Hey, that's no way to treat the chosen one. But okay. Where do you keep all the nukes?" replied Shaun Campbell.

"There's a button right here, but you're gonna have to aim 'em. There still all aimed at Russia from the Cold War. Oh and some of them are aimed at Iraq or Iran or Afghanistan, I get em all mixed up. But here's the aimy thingy, you just use this here controller." said the president."Oh yeah, some are aimed at the moon."

"Why do you have nukes aimed at the moon?" questioned Shaun Campbell.

"Um, uh, well, um, why do you have nukes aimed at the moon?" replied the president.

"Oh real mature. And I don't even have any nukes," said Shaun Campbell.

"Oh, sure, that's what they all say. Just look at Iraq! Well, it turns out they were telling the truth, but still!" said the president.

"I don't have time for this. I have a world to save," said Shaun Campbell dramatically.

The president handed Shaun Campbell a TV with a controller that looked suspiciously like an Xbox controller attached to it. On the screen was an X that he could move with the controller. He zoomed way out, and aimed over to the alien's planet.

"Okay, they're all aimed," said Shaun Campbell. "Where's the launch button?"

"Right here in the middle of my desk. You have no idea how many times I've almost launched 'em all." replied the president.

Shaun Campbell ran over and pressed the button. They all turned to look at the screen. After about a ten minute delay (the planet was pretty far away), the nukes hit. They rapid fired into the planet one after another. The nuking lasted a couple hours, and the planet was obliterated.

"Jeez, how many nukes do you have?" asked Shaun Campbell.

"I dunno, we lost track at around 17,000. But I guess we have pretty many! And that was just half, the others are buried under the white house. But Mr. Shaun Campbell, you have just saved the world, just like the prophecy said. I now call you Shaun The Conqueror." said the president.

"I kinda like Shaun The Great," said Shaun The Conqueror.

"Well, it can be both then," said the president.

And that was how the legend was born. And now for the epic story I was telling you about. I might have to finish later because some men with black suits just came in and they don't look like they're here for tea. They're all babbling about how I'm not supposed to say Shaun The Conqueror's real name or something, so this is the end, for now.